Bank of America fears Wikileaks’ next release

Posted on December 23, 2010

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Bank of America is the target of Wikileaks’ next release, which will focus on banks.

To show just how seriously companies now view Wikileaks, BoA is reportedly buying up domain names such as BofASucks.com, BrianMoynihanBlows.com, BrianMoynihanSucks.com, BrianTMoynihanBlows.com, and of course, BrianTMoynihanSucks.com. Brian Moynihan, if you didn’t know, is the CEO of Bank of America.

Well, given that Bank of America gladly took $45 Billion tax dollars during the TARP bailouts and turned around immediately and gave their top executives more than $209 Million in bonuses, and then paid their outgoing CEO Kenneth D. Lewis a $170 Million golden parachute severance package (on top of his annual pay) when he slithered off at the height of the financial meltdown, and then jacked up the interest rates on all except their top-most tier credit cards, I’m at a bit of a loss to feel like Moynihan’s being victimized. All of this is happening because Wikileaks is about to make public a slew of documents showing exactly, in detail, how Bank of America has screwed it’s customers. And Mr. Moynihan fears this, because as their slogan says, Bank of America has “Higher Standards.” They just forgot to include the word “double.”

In 2009, Lewis received $4,209,666 in total compensation. By comparison, the average worker made $32,048 in 2009. Kenneth D. Lewis was paid 131 times the average worker’s pay. In 2010, current CEO Brian T. Moynihan is expected to receive a total compensation package of $4,512,782, plus “undisclosed stock options.” All while many of his customers are being thrown out into the street because they couldn’t maintain the ballooned mortgage payment that his bank refused to help with.

Known throughout the financial industry as the most shameless of all banks and mortgage companies in the utter disdain they’re showing toward their customers in need, BofA is hoping to cover all bases by buying these and many, many other domains. Oh how badly they underestimate the creativity and perseverance of the modern Internet vengeful.

For instance, this evening I bought www.bofascrewscustomers.com. Why? Let’s just call it an overt sense of justice. I don’t have any accounts with BofA, but I know people who recently received generic, unsigned form letters from BofA giving no explanation or reason whatsoever to their request for mortgage revision or some kind of assistance program, saying “Sorry, there’s nothing we can do to help you. Keep making your payments.”

Bank of America lists 15 different programs on their website under a kitchy little “Help for Homeowners” button.  But clearly, as their form letter demonstrates, a single person with a $50,000 income and a mortgage that’s $140,000 upside in current market conditions, doesn’t qualify for any of them.

And we’re not even talking about the people with $200,000 combined salaries who simply decided to walk away from their mortgage, stay in the house through the entire year-plus-long bureaucratic foreclosure proceeding, and pocket more than a dozen of their $4,400 mortgage payments into an account they had their parents open for them in another state. We’re talking about a single person who just asked for help from the bank; a few months extension so they could catch up, a simple interest rate reduction, something.  But no. Bank of America won’t help those kind of people. They’re too busy helping people hide the tax benefits on their second, third or sixth home (right Senator McCain?).

So yeah, I’m inclined to list Bank of America very near the top of the list of evil, faceless, bloated, parasitic corporations.

And within a few days, there will be an open blog on www.bofascrewscustomers.com for people to post their BofA screw-stories, or just vent. Doesn’t matter to me. I will, of course, have a full, clear disclaimer in plain sight to state that the opinions and views expressed on the blog are those of the posters, and are not in any way reflective of those of the domain’s owner.

And if Brian T. Moynihan has a problem with that, I’ll be glad to send him a nice prefabricated, unsigned generic form letter telling him exactly where he can deposit his complaint.

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Posted in: Errata